Friday, 31 October 2014

Two stabs at the heart

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last Sunday was my birthday and all I wanted after the recent events was a quite family get to together in my home. My step-father had passed away the previous Sunday and with his cremation service only a few days away I was in no mood for celebrations.

Then I received a call from my sister just after I had opened all my presents and cards while in bed with my wife and two children snuggled up by my side. She was in tears and her voice struggled to release the news she had for me. My niece had lost her baby. She had been pregnant and it was a small ray of light on the  low horizon of doom that had engulfed all our lives recently. My sister would have become a granny for the first time and my mum would have had her first grand child. The child's birth wouldn't have taken away the pain my mum is going through in loosing Tadger, but it would have a least soothed her agony.

The service on Tuesday went to plan with plenty of people attending and the wake at the Kind Alfred pub was a traditional British affair. I thought that after this I would be able to cheer myself up and start to get back to some sort of normal life, but how wrong have I been again. The numbness just won't go away and it's a struggle to leave my home at the moment. Tonight my team Norwich City F.C are playing Bolton at Carrow Road with the game being beamed live on the television. Normally I would be looking forward to having a Friday night out with my friends afterwards, hopefully celebrating a home win, but I just don't fancy it. I'm going to drive to the ground and carry out my steward duties and then come straight home.

How things seem to be going at the moment I expect Norwich to loose the game. In fact I don't care what happens tonight, all I care about is being with my family, especially the senior members because my life seems to be hurtling along so quickly before I know it they will all be gone, and then my time will be up.



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